Dear Gossip Girl,
How are you? I know you've been here for a while, but we haven't really connected. You've been saying some crazy things plot-wise and I think for a while, you might have lost your way. Glad to see you back on the right path. I know you standard weekly plot all too well:
1. Serena pouts and makes bad decisions
2.Blair plots evil deeds and feels bad about it later
2a. Mention a bunch of fancy designers and A-listers
3. Dorota says snappy things "in thick Russian Accent"
4. cool dresses
5. gossip girl blast
6. moment of family support
7. plan for sabotage
8. big fancy event
9. more cool dresses
10. gossip girl blast
11. Love triangle (or other applicable shape)
12." ..But you told me to meet you here, right?"
13. Dan gets emo
14. Rufus shines as a trophy husband
15. moment of scandal that threatens the balance of life in the upper east side
(usually in conjunction with gossip girl blast)
16. family secrets are revealed
17. some things get resolved while others get worse
But tonight broke the mold. It tapped into something- the old guard Gossip Girl, back in the days of high school, when things made a little more sense to us, the little people. The days when the biggest scandal was Serena making out with Nate while he was dutifully dating Blair (water under the bridge). Although I had a tragic flashback to seeing Tripp and a car crash in the same episode (December, two years ago I believe, or was it just last year?), it had punch. Here's what I loved and loathed:
LOVE:
1. Blair's in love with Chuck, who is also in love with Blair (but he knows Dan and Louis love Blair, so he backs away), but Dan is in love with Blair, and Serena is once again (wow what a selfish bee-yotch) in love with Dan.
2. Blair and Chuck pulling a Diana (as in Princess)
3. Dan picking up pizza and Evian for his houseguest, Blair
4. Cray cray Charlie/Ivy almost getting exposed
5. Nate fighting Grandpa but sucking it up to be the golden grandson (very Kennedy)
6. Dan arranging a secret meeting between Blair and Chuck
7. FINALLY- they make it 100% obvious that Elizabeth Hurley (Diana) is Chuck's mum.
8. Serena and Nate's commitment to take down Gossip Girl with their little website.
HATE:
1. The entire car accident scene. Train wreck. First, why was Nate's car following Blair and Chuck? Why did his driver not know to take him to the airport in Westchester?And furthermore, what creepy deserted forest that they drove for miles and miles through was supposed to be passed off as Central Park?
2. Charlie's such a weakling. One little car accident and she flees?
3. Dan moping.
4. Serena liking Dan when it's convenient for her
PREDICTIONS:
1. Blair's losing that baby.
2. Chuck's gonna live but this whole mama/baby drama's going to mindwarp him
3. Chuck's finally going to meet his mama
4. Serena's still gonna be a beey-otch.
5. Unsure about weddings.........
6. Louis's not going away without a fight
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