Love Notes: RHONY Season 12.1 - Bethenny Who?

I am now addicted to RHONY, also known as Real Housewives of New York. It's a sweet sweet panacea to see middle aged women drunk fighting with each other, crying over lost love, and generally making a mess... It's a blissful reminder of the "before" times. Here are some of my favorite quotes from the season 12 premiere:

Exchange between Sonja and Ramona:
R: "I thought your dog is dead...?"
S: "No he's alive and humping."

Tinsley:
"I won't cheers if you're not drinking alcohol!"

Dorinda:
"I'm the only one in this group that really knows how to throw a party."

Ramona:
I just want someone to love me again!!!!!

John the dry cleaner:
"Why are we having a party for Luann getting off probation? This happens to people all the time."

Leah:

• Last week, I got drunk and lost my channel bag and passport.
• William looks like the kind of guy where you have to say "what are you rubbing my thigh?"

BEST ACTION: Drag queen dances to Luann's single, "Feeling Jovani."